Thanks to my work, I have long understood that judging people or situations is of no use but it is better to learn from the others instead of judging them, avoiding to transform our security into blind arrogance.
The fact that someone knows how certain things are done and that others don’t, does not authorize the former to judge the latter. One never knows how they found themselves in a certain situation. It is easy to pronounce sentences, but if you do not know the facts, you run the risk, at some point, of finding yourself in that exact situation from which you distanced yourself.
It took me some time to understand it but there is no right or wrong way to do things, just as there is no single way. Instead, there are most effective, most useful ways and the one that makes us achieve our goal in the best possible way.
This does not mean that we should not behave ethically or that we should harm others but simply that nobody has the truth in his pocket and that in order to correct things we must first understand them.
Judging is reserved only to those who do it by trade
Whoever judges, if he is not a professional judge, is almost never in a position to understand and therefore ends up wasting energy when he could instead work to understand the situation and only subsequently give his suggestion.
This is the main reason why I always explain to the people I work with and to whom my role requires me to teach them things, which are not there to judge them but simply to understand why it is the only way I have to help them do differently. .
Listening is very useful if you want to learn because it allows us to collect all the elements to get a precise idea of a situation. The aim is not to judge but simply if and how it can be done better.
The same speech I do with those who get angry. There is no need to blame someone but it is more useful to understand the reason for his behavior so that together we can find a solution that satisfies both.
Listening and observing helps to evolve
The key is therefore not to judge and not to feel judged, especially when exposing the facts that serve to base a strategy. Communicating things as they are without feeling judged is fundamental even if the counterpart does not seem to want to understand or wants to judge, because it is the only way to be able to unravel even complex situations. And above all to evolve through the knowledge of points of view different from ours.
we may like them or not, but it’s one thing to have your own tastes and preferences, it’s one thing to judge those of others by prevaricating them.
And if someone continues to make judgments about everything and everyone, then the problem is uniquely his and it is better to let it go or simply pretend not to listen to it. So in this case nothing would change anyway.
The next step is to blame people for anything
Unfortunately after the trial the guilty one arrives. A classic that has its roots in our culture but that does not always make sense. I want to say that if there are problems it would be better to find ways to deal with them instead of wasting time and energy to find the manager who, almost always, acted as he saw fit or without adequate information.
I don’t know if you’ve ever noticed, but most people make mistakes in total good faith and generally because they don’t have the information to avoid making them. So why blame them? Of course, maybe next time it’s better to get well informed and make sure you do things the right way, but it’s totally useless to blame those who make mistakes. Better to help him understand where he went wrong and once again, avoiding any judgment.
Try it, you will see that you will get real miracles.